The Blog
Deal Breakers in Relationships: 6 Steps to Asserting Your Non-Negotiables
Are you often unhappy in your relationship, but feel confused about whether it’s just you, or if there is something truly amiss? Do you feel unclear about your bottom lines? Do you question whether or not you should stay in the relationship? If so, you may be dealing...
Emotional Manipulation: What it is and how to deal with it
Have you ever wondered how somebody got you to do something you didn't really want to do? Or why you ended up in a situation that you didn't feel you chose? If you frequently feel this way around your partner, then you may want to consider whether or not you are being...
Holiday Relationship Stress: How to Have a Peaceful, Connected Holiday
I don’t know about you, but I have to be careful during the holidays to avoid the pressure to uphold expectations of idyllic holiday experiences for my various family members. I love baking and listening to Christmas music, and have always associated the holidays with...
Defensiveness: How to let go of your armor
Do you feel bad if somebody gives you less-than-positive feedback? Do you automatically deny, resist, deflect, or counter with arguments? If so, this is blocking growth in your relationships. Don’t worry, defensiveness comes from a place of survival. You’re probably...
How to Surrender in Relationships: 6 Ways to Full Acceptance without Losing Anything
Have you ever grappled with the concept of surrendering in love? Theoretically it sounds blissful doesn’t it? Especially in the beginning of a relationship, it feels good to give way to something bigger than us. But if you’ve ever had lots of conflict in your...
Gender Issues: His and Her Relationships
A man and a woman in the same heterosexual relationship are actually in different relationships. Well, let me rephrase that. Happy couples have fewer gender differences. But in unhappy relationships, there are clear differences between men and women in emotional...
Why you married one of your parents: Imago matching and what to do about it
Do you often wonder if you picked the wrong partner? You were SO in love, and now you just can't get what you need from them. This common experience in relationships is a tribute to the power of the subconscious mind, which--let’s face it--is what chose your partner....
Emotional Connection: The Root of Relationship Health
Have you ever noticed how all your communication skills go out the window when you are mad? Or how you say things in the worst possible way when you feel slighted? There are countless theories and books on relationships out there--exercises for better communication...
When to Divorce: and What to Try First
The question of when to divorce is a big one for troubled couples. Partners in pain ask when they should throw in the towel. What is the right amount of time to work on the relationship, and how do you know it is really done? It feels good to think about an escape....
How to Set Boundaries: 5 Ways to Set Your Limits in a Relationship
In my line of work, we talk about boundaries a lot. We know what they are, why they are important, and how to set boundaries with others. But in my early relationships, that is something I needed to learn from the inside-out. I had to think hard about what...